Category — Customer Service

Milton Kramer got a check from the US government for one cent.  Fearing there might be some obscure regulation about not cashing government checks, he went to the bank. 

He handed it to the teller,  who glanced at the endorsement, then at the front of the check, and asked, “How would you like that sir?  Heads or tails?”

It was remarkable enough for Mr. Kramer to send it in to the New York Times (which has a column with reader submissions for tales of the big, bad city).  And noteworthy enough for The Times to print it, and for me to repeat it.

Small things can make a big difference in the way your clients perceive you.  Do a little something extra.  Give them free soup. Make them smile.  Send a note for no particular reason, except that it’s National Tortilla Chip Day (which it is).  Include some chips.

You can check out Part One here.

Photo compliments of sids1/

My mom got a  PajamaGram for Valentine’s Day yesterday.  It was packed in a pretty hatbox with a gauzy bow, bath salts, and a card. Someone clearly put a lot of thought into the packaging.

She not only loved the gift inside, she liked the hatbox so much she wanted to buy another one and use them for pretty storage boxes.

So she called PajamaGram.  No luck.  No matter how much she tried.  They wouldn’t give her one.  They wouldn’t sell her one.  They said she had to buy something to get another box.

Could have been a chance to make a happy customer even happier.  She would have told people.  She would have raved.

It would have been thoughtful. A great way to make a connection with a customer, and gain a new fan. But no. Instead, they followed the “rules.” They did what the manual and the lizard brain (don’t stick out, don’t make your own decisions, be afraid) told them to do.

So, instead of a rave, they get a big Bronx cheer.

Manuals are great when they protect you from dangerous mistakes (turn off the electricity before you touch an exposed wire). They’re not so good when they create a barrier between you and your client.

Image: morguefile

New York City’s streets are full of fruit stands.  Bananas for 25 cents each or a pound of grapes for $1.50. The prices are much lower than the markets and the fruit is fresh.

Free soup! Or was it?

There was one particular stand I used to buy from a lot. He’d often put in an extra piece of fruit; an apricot or an apple. I’d walk away feeling happy, thinking he was using a “free soup strategy” and being nice.

Then, one day, I bought fruit for prices that I could easily add up in my head: 5 bananas for $1, a box of strawberries for $2. He added an apple and told me the total was $2.50OOPS, I meant $3.50… I then realized what he’d really been doing. He was giving me extra fruit all right, but it wasn’t free! He was selling me bananas, and then figuratively throwing the peels on the sidewalk so I could slip on them.

I felt ripped off, and I’ve never bought fruit from him again. Heck, I don’t even like apricots! I just didn’t want to seem rude by turning down what I thought was a gift.

The big business version

Slate/The Big Money reported on November 25, 2009 that Best Buy sells a $40 optimization service for both Macs and PCs. According to the article, for $40 the buyer gets his/her name entered into the computer, a network connection check, a scan of the hard drive, and an anti-virus program installed.

There’s no reason for any of this. If you plan to use a computer, you probably can type your own name. The network in the store isn’t the network in your home or office, where the computer will actually be used. The drives are brand-new, so there’s nothing bad on them. Anti-virus software?! I’ve never seen a Mac virus, nor heard of anyone who has.

The author of the article talked with Ezra Gottheil [who works for an independent research firm called Technology Business Research]. Said Gottheil, ” ‘There’s nothing of that sort that any brand-new PC needs, and Macs less so’ ”

[I personally set my Mac up by myself in about 10 minutes, and I'm not a geek.]

Helping? Or pushing?

Slapstick is funny when the other guy slips on a banana peel. It’s not so funny when you invite your clients to fall down and hurt themselves.

If you’re offering an extra free service, offer one that has real value, and is really free. If you have an upgrade, it ought to be worth more to the client than the standard version.

Image: redster

UPDATE: Someone just pointed out that my math was messed up (told you I couldn’t add). However, since the rest of the comment was abusive and nasty, it has been deleted.

We hear a lot about rotten service, companies that don’t care, bad PR, lack of trust, and all around cynicism.

Today, two examples of gold star kick-butt service.

A Bad Experience Becomes a Happy One

First up is Amazon. I bought my brother a pair of Dewalt “lumberjack gloves” as a gift. The first time he wore them, they started to unravel. I contacted Amazon, and while their email contact system needs some work (you can’t reply to their response directly, but have to go back to their web site and start over), the click to call rocks!

They gave me a refund, told me to order a new pair, credited me with the difference in the current price (it’s higher now) and the shipping, and will send them directly to my brother. He doesn’t even have to return the old gloves. I got great service, without being a rock star, or complaining publicly.

Losers Still Win

Next is FreshDirect (online grocer in New York). A couple of months ago, they asked for submissions from customers about how FreshDirect makes your life better. I sent an email, and got a call for an audition. A week later, they called me back for a second take with the director. I didn’t make the final cut, but they just sent me a gift card for $300 worth of free food!!!

Both are standouts… worth remarking about. I told my friends, I’m telling you too. Think what being remarkable can do for your business.

Got a story to tell about a company that’s remarkable? Share it in the comments.

Image: love food

I just escaped from customer service hell. I was on the phone with the bank trying to make a simple transfer of funds from account A to account B.

Should be easy. It wasn’t. They’ve been taken over by another bank, changed their prompts, and added more steps. My pin number was messed up and I couldn’t make the transfer.

So I called the 800 number, and sat on hold, typing as I listened to musak, wondering what happened to the friendly, helpful bank I used to do business with.

I had to wait and wait, but finally got connected to someone who made my transfer for me. Next up, fixing the pin number.

The rep said, you need to talk to the branch (and transferred me). The branch said, you need to call the 800 number. Argghh!!!

It took a couple more rounds, a call back, resetting the passwords to the default, and then calling and resetting each account to straighten it all out.

The lessons for marketing

• Make it easy for your customers to interact with you.
• Don’t add extra steps to transactions. The fewer buttons, fewer fields and fewer forms, the better.
• Double-check your work. Test everything before it goes live.
• Mistakes do happen. If you make one, admit the error and fix it.
• Don’t send people round and round from person to person. If you don’t know the answer, offer to find out, and call the customer back.

Photo:basykes